I have been so exhausted for the past couple of days that I think a coma is in order to get my energy level back up above “zombie” in the evenings.
I’ve been back at work for a week now. I have my good days and my bad but even on better days, I find myself so damned tired by the time I get home that I can barely lift my feet off the ground to walk into the apartment. I haven’t fallen asleep on the bus (yet) but that’s only because I keep my music blasting fairly hard and generally drink a Coke in the afternoon before I leave the office.
It’s the having to “be myself” at work that I was before my brother died that’s draining me so much right now. It didn’t used to take this much energy to be witty, sarcastic, silly, and still pretty damned competent and efficient at my job in the past. That’s always been so easy that I still had plenty of energy left over for raiding or running dungeons in the evenings. Now I’m lucky if I can string together a coherent paragraph in Alayne’s Story after work. I hear my own voice over Ventrilo and I know I sound “off” at home but damned if I can find the energy to inject any kind of emotion in my voice other than the “Jesus Christ I’m tired and I want to go to bed” feeling.
And no, I’m not whining and saying that you guys won’t get an update. You’ll get one this week. And every week after that for the foreseeable future. I’m just so frickin’ tired, though, and I don’t really have any other place to whine about it than here.
Right, enough of that. Bed and then back to the grind tomorrow.
I’ve just posted the latest update to Alayne’s Story over at the WoW-Europe RP forums. This week’s update starts the ramp up to figuring out what’s going on in Ulduar and what it has to do with Silithus and other points of interest.
I’m really looking forward to BlizzCon so I can see if there’s going to be another expansion to WoW and, if so, what the storyline might be like. I’m having trouble focusing on my writing lately (gee, wonder why that would be) and maybe if I can see something cool coming down the road, I can find the enthusiasm to work on this more. Right now, all I really want to do is raid until I fall asleep at the computer as long as my group doesn’t make me want to strangle them with their own entrails.
God help me; I never want to go through another week like that again. Ever.
I got absolutely no writing done. I barely had my computer turned on. I spent most of my time with my parents. My brother’s visitation and funeral were beautiful and very well attended. I think there were over 400 people at both. AMR and all of the local volunteer fire houses had their trucks out there to escort him from the funeral home to the cemetery. It was really nice to see just how many friends he had and how well-liked he was.
On top of that, we found out he had a daughter. So, I’m an aunt.
I’m back home myself now. Jet-lagged and tired but home. I’ll go back to work some time this week. I’ll get started on my writing again and will, hopefully, post an update this Friday. However, for now, I’m just really tired and really glad that last week is over. Part of me is still hoping I’ll wake up to find it was just a really vivid (and really bad) dream.
There may not be an update at all next week. Last night, I found out that my younger brother died. My husband and I are going to fly back to the US tomorrow morning to be with my family for a while. I probably won’t get any writing done (I just can’t focus on it right now) and I probably will not post an update to the story next week.
I am so glad I have next week off for vacation. I really need to get caught up in my updates. This week’s has just been posted and takes us the rest of the way through the characters’ trip to Sholazar Basin. Hints of events to come are dropped in though only in the most…incomplete…sense.